Michael georgy

When that happens, I am just like any drug addict desperate for another hit. Depression sets in and I am consumed by self-doubt, guilt and paranoia - mostly about failing at my job no matter how well I do. That has been my number one trigger and the most difficult thing to deal with. I work overtime to avoid concluding I am failing at work.

Ironically, that relentless work and self-inflicted stress ultimately makes me crash. When it is really bad I feel like I would rather be dead than experience this excruciating pain and sense that there is no hope.

Michael georgy obituary

In both cases I tend to push people away. What I am describing is bipolar disorder, or manic depression, one of the most difficult mental illnesses to treat. For many years I tried to describe this condition to the few people I had told. I had caved in to the stigma around mental illness, and largely kept it a secret. I am 54, with about 30 years of experience as a reporter.